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Do you ever get up in the morning and wonder if it would be okay for you to take a mental health day? If so, you’re definitely not alone. In fact, research from the American Psychological Association shows that today’s workforce is experiencing job burnout at alarming rates. What are Mental Health Days Exactly? The […]
Do you ever get up in the morning and wonder if it would be okay for you to take a mental health day? If so, you’re definitely not alone. In fact, research from the American Psychological Association shows that today’s workforce is experiencing job burnout at alarming rates.
What are Mental Health Days Exactly?
The good news is that taking a mental health day every once in a while can absolutely help you cope with work-related stress. But mental health days should not be confused with sick days.
Mental health days are simply those times when you need to take a break from anything work related. These personal days are used to reset your mind by focusing on activities that rejuvenate and reenergize you.
The following are some red flags that are letting you know you need to put your mental health first:
You Feel Run Down
Being stressed and overworked can take a toll on your mind and body. If you’ve been feeling run down for a period of time, take a break.
You Feel Angry More Often
When we feel stressed and burned out, we become angry far more easily and far more often. If you find you have been getting easily irritated, this is a sign it may be time for a mental health day.
You’re Having a Hard Time Focusing
When we’re stressed, our mental faculties take a hit and we can’t focus as easily. This makes it incredibly hard to get any work done. Which of course just makes us feel more stressed.
If you notice your cognitive abilities have declined a bit, may be time to call off work for a day of destressing.
If you have been experiencing any of these signs, I encourage you to put your mental health first and take a mental health day. And if you would like to speak to someone about how you’re feeling, please reach out to me. I’m a great listener and have numerous tools for coping with stress that I can share with you.
SOURCES:
https://info.totalwellnesshealth.com/blog/mental-health-day-from-work
https://www.livestrong.com/article/13767705-how-to-take-mental-health-day/
Bipolar disorder is a condition that affects an individual’s mood. While manageable, the condition not only affects how a person thinks and feels, but also how they behave and act in romantic relationships. For instance, individuals with bipolar disorder experience severe high and low moods, which are typically called manic and depressive episodes. While in […]
Bipolar disorder is a condition that affects an individual’s mood. While manageable, the condition not only affects how a person thinks and feels, but also how they behave and act in romantic relationships. For instance, individuals with bipolar disorder experience severe high and low moods, which are typically called manic and depressive episodes. While in these emotional states, their behavior can scare and confuse their partner.
The good news is, with the right treatment plan, many individuals with bipolar disorder can have healthy and satisfying relationships.
Manic vs Depressive Episodes
In order to understand how bipolar disorder can affect relationships, we need to look at how the two main episodes affect a person’s personality and behavior.
When someone is in a manic state, they are often very irritable. This may cause them to disagree with their partner, and sometimes cause them to look for fights that aren’t really there.
Manic episodes also cause sufferers to partake in risky behaviors, such as binge drinking or gambling sprees. These risky behaviors can cause a lot of tension in the relationship.
Depressive episodes tend to cause the person to become very depressed and less communicative. They may be very weepy and feel hopeless. During these episodes the individual may pull away from their partner. They may also seem so lost and sad their partner feels overwhelmed and unable to help them.
Tips for Healthy Relationships
There is no relationship on the planet that doesn’t require a lot of work and effort. A relationship with a bipolar individual is no different. The good news is, there are numerous ways to build a loving and strong relationship in this situation:
Takeaway
If you’ve been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, or if you are on the verge or diving into a relationship with someone who has, know that the condition does not mean you will be saddled with problems. But a healthy relationship will depend on effectively managing symptoms.
If you’d like to work with a licensed mental health therapist who specializes in working with individuals with bipolar disorder, please give my office a call. I’d be happy to discuss treatment plans and how I may be able to help you experience a profound and loving connection with others.
SOURCES:
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/324380
https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/conditions-and-diseases/mood-disorders/bipolar-relationships-what-to-expect
https://www.bipolarlife.org.au/how-can-bipolar-disorder-affect-relationships/
Life has been beyond challenging for most of us the last couple of years as we’ve dealt with a global pandemic and subsequent lockdowns. And just when we thought we were all out of the woods and life was back to normal, we now find ourselves facing sky high inflation, a recession, and the threat […]
Life has been beyond challenging for most of us the last couple of years as we’ve dealt with a global pandemic and subsequent lockdowns. And just when we thought we were all out of the woods and life was back to normal, we now find ourselves facing sky high inflation, a recession, and the threat of WW III. Needless to say, these events can trigger some pretty strong emotions in us.
We never want to fully deny our emotions. Feeling them is how we process the events of our lives. But there comes the point where we need to figure out a way to move through the emotions and get safely to the other side. One of the most effective ways to do this is through mindfulness.
Mindfulness is a simple, non-judgmental awareness of the present moment. It is a powerful way to connect with our bodies and emotions, but in a higher state of awareness.
Mindfulness helps us regulate our emotions by putting us in a calm and relaxed state of presence. From here we can have a more mature and sensible point of view of the events in our lives.
Second, when practiced regularly, mindfulness can help us develop skills that promote emotional maturity and self-regulation. These skills include self-awareness and attentional control.
And finally, mindfulness can increase the time between trigger and response. In this way, mindfulness acts a bit like an advanced warning system, alerting us to a potential ugly scene, giving us time to engage in emotional self-monitoring. This gives us the opportunity to choose our emotional response very, very carefully.
There are many online resources for getting started with a mindfulness meditation practice. Spend some time searching Google and exploring Youtube for some helpful sites and videos.
If you are interested in working privately with someone on regulating your emotions, please reach out to me. I use mindfulness in my practice with clients and would be happy to answer any questions you may have.
Sources:
https://mentalhealthmatch.com/articles/skills/what-is-mindfulness-and-how-to-use-it-to-regulate-emotions
Sharing your life with someone means having open and honest conversations, even when those conversations are a bit difficult. But that’s easier said than done. During hard conversations, it’s common for many people to become triggered by something their partner has said. Calm one moment, but the next they’re thrown into “fight or flight” mode, […]
Sharing your life with someone means having open and honest conversations, even when those conversations are a bit difficult. But that’s easier said than done.
During hard conversations, it’s common for many people to become triggered by something their partner has said. Calm one moment, but the next they’re thrown into “fight or flight” mode, their brain sensing danger. Before they know it, the most primitive part of their brain is activated in an effort to help them survive. And this is when things can get ugly. Because it’s fairly impossible to speak calmly and rationally when your entire body is in survival mode.
Luckily there are things we can do during difficult conversations to regulate our emotional responses and keep ourselves calm and level-headed.
Pause and Breathe
As soon as you start to feel triggered, pause and take a few slow, deep breaths. While deep breathing may seem like a cliche, it is actually a very powerful tool that helps us get out of “fight or flight” mode and into a more relaxed state. When we breathe slowly and deeply, it sends a signal to our brain that we are out of danger.
Use Your Senses
Another effective way to regulate your emotions in the moment is to focus your attention on a physical sensation. You could take a sip of water and really feel the sensation of drinking, or you could run your fingers along the seam of the sofa cushion.
Listen Fully
It is so common in a conversation to listen to form a response. But when we do this it is far easier to misunderstand what the other person is really saying. Be sure to listen to understand, not to form a response.
Difficult conversations are inevitable when you are in any kind of relationship. But if you use these tips to regulate yourself, you can remain calm and communicate effectively with your partner.
SOURCES:
https://www.hope-wellness.com/blog/hard-relationship-conversations
https://hbr.org/2017/12/how-to-control-your-emotions-during-a-difficult-conversation
There is a very old saying that says, “Don’t cut off your nose to spite your face.” This is a warning to people to not act out in anger or resentment because you only end up harming yourself. Over time, these feelings of resentment can build until the individual develops feelings of depression or anxiety. […]
There is a very old saying that says, “Don’t cut off your nose to spite your face.” This is a warning to people to not act out in anger or resentment because you only end up harming yourself. Over time, these feelings of resentment can build until the individual develops feelings of depression or anxiety.
While forgiving others who have hurt us isn’t always easy, in the end, it greatly benefits our mental health and overall well-being. To be clear, forgiving others does NOT mean you agree with or condor their poor behavior. And it doesn’t mean you are announcing that your feelings don’t matter. Forgiveness simply means letting go of the negative feelings that are holding you down and causing you prolonged distress.
Again, forgiving someone who has hurt you isn’t easy, but it will lead you to a sense of peace and joy. Here are some steps you can take to forgive others:
Process Your Pain
Have you really faced your pain and processed it? You’ll need to do this before you can let those feelings go. Give yourself permission to feel your feelings deeply and fully. Cry, yell, hit your pillow, do whatever it takes.
Forgive Yourself
It takes two to tango, as they say. While we can easily point to others and blame them for the breakup or ugly incident, the truth is, we were there also. We played some role. Even if it was to retaliate in the moment and to show our own ugliness. It’s time to forgive your own humanity and any wrongdoing to yourself or others.
Try to Understand
True forgiveness is impossible without a sense of understanding. You can try to forgive, claim you have forgiven, only to have those negative nagging feelings crop up again and again. When we try to understand why someone has acted the way they have, it can wipe out the negative feelings instantly, almost as if by magic.
A critical parent acts the way they act because they, too, were the victim of a critical parent. An overbearing boss is dealing with a personal tragedy at home. Our cheating spouse is self-sabotaging his or her life because they have incredibly low self-esteem and do not feel they deserve happiness. Life is complicated and human beings are even more so. Try and understand why someone has hurt you. You will be amazed at what this magical A-ha moment can do for you.
And if you’d like to speak to someone and get some guidance and much-needed perspective, please reach out to me.
SOURCES:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/complicated-love/202006/the-healing-power-forgiveness
https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/the-power-of-forgiveness
https://www.verywellmind.com/the-benefits-of-forgiveness-3144954
We all believe we know what narcissism looks like. After all, aren’t a majority of politicians and Hollywood A-listers narcissists, projecting their massive egos onto the world? While that may be true, narcissists come in all shapes and sizes. They walk among us, some of them obvious, and some of them covert. So how can […]
We all believe we know what narcissism looks like. After all, aren’t a majority of politicians and Hollywood A-listers narcissists, projecting their massive egos onto the world?
While that may be true, narcissists come in all shapes and sizes. They walk among us, some of them obvious, and some of them covert.
So how can you tell if you’re dealing with an actual narcissist or just someone who is a bit full of themself? Here are a handful of traits the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-V) lists as characteristics that someone is a narcissist:
A Grandiose Sense of Self-Importance
Narcissists see themselves as incredibly essential to the success and happiness of other people. In their eyes, they believe they are capable of exceptionally high levels of achievement, whether they are or aren’t in reality.
They are Special or Unique
Narcissists believe they are so special and unique that few people can really understand them. Many will only want to spend time around high-status people.
A Need for Admiration
We all can admit it feels good to be appreciated and admired. But narcissists have an absolute need for admiration and a lot of it.
A Sense of Entitlement
Narcissists truly believe they are the exception to the rule. If there is a line of people waiting to be seated, a narcissist will cut that line because why should they of all people be forced to wait? If you’ve spent any amount of time around an actual narcissist, their entitlement can be shocking as it seems to know no bounds.
A Lack of Empathy
Narcissist simply cannot imagine how others feel. They are wired differently from non-narcissistic people. When you can’t empathize or feel what someone else is, it makes it incredibly easy to abuse those around you.
These are just some of the main traits of a narcissist. Needless to say, spending any amount of time in their presence can be a very toxic and taxing experience.
SOURCES:
https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/14-signs-of-narcissism
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lifetime-connections/202110/the-13-traits-narcissist
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder
Many people think of burnout as simply being incredibly tired after a long week or month of work or school studies. But burnout is much more than a physical exhaustion; it has in fact been called the “triad of depersonalization, emotional exhaustion, and feelings of detachment.” Here are some additional signs of burnout: Pessimism Pessimism […]
Many people think of burnout as simply being incredibly tired after a long week or month of work or school studies. But burnout is much more than a physical exhaustion; it has in fact been called the “triad of depersonalization, emotional exhaustion, and feelings of detachment.”
Here are some additional signs of burnout:
Pessimism
Pessimism is a major red flag that someone is experiencing burnout. And they won’t just feel pessimistic about whatever it is that is causing them big stress (job, school, relationship), they will feel pessimistic about life and the world at large.
Sleep Issues
Burnout makes it incredibly hard to get a good night’s rest. Either a person finds it hard to fall asleep, lying there wide awake for hours, or they fall asleep but then wake up throughout the night. When we don’t get enough quality sleep, it makes it difficult to cope with stress, which makes it hard to sleep, and the vicious cycle continues.
Sudden Physical Ailments
A major sign of burnout is suddenly experiencing physical symptoms that you never have before. For instance, many of my clients, with no prior history of GI upset or headaches, will begin to have chronic issues.
Burnout shouldn’t be taken lightly. You shouldn’t try to ‘tough it out’ and get on with things. Now is the time to make your mental health a priority. If you would like to speak with someone about what has been bothering you, please reach out to me.
Sources:
https://www.everydayhealth.com/burnout/unusual-signs-of-burnout/
https://positivepsychology.com/burnout/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/burnout
Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) affects millions of people in this country from all walks of life. If you or a loved one suffers with OCD, you know the symptoms typically include developing strict routines or avoiding specific objects or situations. But what is the root cause of OCD and how exactly do these behaviors manifest? […]
Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) affects millions of people in this country from all walks of life. If you or a loved one suffers with OCD, you know the symptoms typically include developing strict routines or avoiding specific objects or situations. But what is the root cause of OCD and how exactly do these behaviors manifest? Once an individual understands how OCD behaviors show up, they can better manage their symptoms.
Health experts are not able to point to one direct cause of OCD, though they have suggested that a family history of the condition may increase a person’s likelihood of developing the behaviors. In addition, it is thought that irregular brain development or impairment of certain regions in the brain may also be linked to the condition. For example, the National Institute of Mental Health suggests OCD may be linked to how your brain responds to serotonin, a neurotransmitter that helps regulate mood and sleep.
The following are some other believed factor that contribute to the manifestation of OCD behaviors:
Stress or Trauma
Suffering from stress or a traumatic event can increase a person’s chances of developing OCD or worsening existing symptoms.
Personality
Certain personality traits are predisposed to manifesting OCD behaviors. Those individuals who are perfectionists or have difficulty handling uncertainty may develop unwanted behaviors.
Childhood Abuse
Children who experience abuse or trauma have a higher chance of developing the condition.
While the symptoms of OCD can make life feel unbearable, there is help. Often the best first step in recovery is to connect with a therapist who has experience successfully treating OCD.
If you’d like to explore treatment options, please get in touch with me. I’d be more than happy to answer any questions you might have.
SOURCES:
https://lynnwinstendoc.com/how-do-ocd-behaviors-manifest/
https://www.healthline.com/health/ocd/social-signs
https://psychcentral.com/ocd/what-ocd-feels-like-being-absolutely-uncertain
Psychotherapy can be a powerful vehicle for personal transformation. By speaking with a trained therapist in a safe and confidential environment, a person has the opportunity to explore their inner world and gain an understanding of their behaviors. Research has now shown that individual psychotherapy can be highly effective at improving the symptoms of a […]
Psychotherapy can be a powerful vehicle for personal transformation. By speaking with a trained therapist in a safe and confidential environment, a person has the opportunity to explore their inner world and gain an understanding of their behaviors.
Research has now shown that individual psychotherapy can be highly effective at improving the symptoms of a wide range of mental health issues such as depression, anxiety and OCD. It can also be beneficial for families, couples and groups.
More and more people are embracing the potential of psychotherapy in their life, but many are confused which is the right type for them. The following are some of the most common types of psychotherapy to give you a better idea of your options:
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is one of the most used modalities in therapy. CBT is effective because it looks at the relationship between an individual’s thoughts, feelings and behaviors. It is a very empowering form of psychotherapy and works on a variety of issues such as depression, anxiety disorders, bipolar disorder, eating disorders and schizophrenia.
Eye Movement Desensitization And Reprocessing Therapy (EMDR)
Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy (EMDR) has been used successfully for decades to treat PTSD. EMDR works by reducing the emotional distress that has been stored away in the brain from past traumas.
In each EMDR session, a trained therapist assists their client in performing a series of back and forth repetitive eye movements that essentially find the lingering traumatic emotions and disarm them.
Interpersonal Therapy
Interpersonal therapy focuses on improving the relationships an individual has with others. In these sessions the trained therapist helps their client evaluate their social interactions to recognize any negative patterns. Patterns can include social isolation and aggression. The goal is for the person to learn strategies for interacting positively with others.
This is by no means an exhaustive list of types of psychotherapy. But if you are interested in learning more about psychotherapy and would like to explore treatment options, I would be happy to speak with you. Please feel free to give my office a call.
SOURCES:
https://www.nami.org/About-Mental-Illness/Treatments/Psychotherapy
https://psychcentral.com/lib/types-of-psychotherapy
https://positivepsychology.com/types-of-therapies/
Each year in this country millions of children are the victims of child abuse at the hands of parents, guardians and other adults. Whether this abuse is physical, sexual, verbal or emotional, it can leave scars on their heart and psyche for many years. Here are just some of the long-term effects of child abuse […]
Each year in this country millions of children are the victims of child abuse at the hands of parents, guardians and other adults. Whether this abuse is physical, sexual, verbal or emotional, it can leave scars on their heart and psyche for many years.
Here are just some of the long-term effects of child abuse on adult survivors:
Forming Healthy Bonds and Relationships
The lingering effects of childhood abuse make it very difficult to trust others and form normal, healthy connections. Survivors may find it particularly difficult to maintain successful romantic relationships as they may not be able to ever let their guard down and be truly vulnerable with their partner.
Developing Health Conditions
Childhood abuse can eventually take a toll on our physical health and wellbeing. In fact, an NIH study suggests that certain symptoms are common in abuse victims, particularly in women who experienced sexual abuse as a child. Symptoms range from back pain to eating disorders, nightmares, severe headaches and even fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue.
A Lack of Confidence
All children should feel safe and secure growing up. In a normal, healthy childhood, a child can emotionally attach to one or more adults who make them feel safe and secure. But in a childhood where the individual suffered some form of abuse, they may never have been able to form trusting bonds with others. And a lack of these secure attachments can negatively impact our ability to interact with the world around us as adults.
If you’re an adult who survived childhood abuse, there is help out there for you. While you cannot change the past, you can heal from the trauma so you can change your present and future.
If you would like to explore treatment in a safe and secure setting, please reach out to me. I am here to provide the tools and safe space in which to explore and process your trauma. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and you can have the amazing life you know you deserve.
SOURCES:
https://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/features/what-to-know-adult-survivor-child-abuse
https://www.okrehab.org/mental-health-guide/how-child-abuse-affects-adult-survivors/